One Soul
by Macx
Summary: sequel to Two Worlds. While Henry accepts Will's help in dealing with his lycan side, he's reluctant to really let the wolf out. BUt to control his abilities, he has to release them... HenryxWill
1. Chapter 1

TITLE: One Soul  
sequel to Two Worlds  
AUTHOR: Macx  
RATING: Mature  
PAIRING: Henry/Will  
SPOILERS: 1.7 and onward, quotes are all from 'Edward'  
DISCLAIMER: None of the characters belong to me, sadly. They are owned by people with a lot more money  
Author's Voice of Warning (aka Author's Standard Note):  
English is not my first language; it's German. I've been writing for fandom for fifteen years in that language, longer in my native language. Any mistakes you find in here, collect them and you might win a prize The spell-checker said everything's okay, but you know how trustworthy those thingies are....  
FEEDBACK: Loved

Aside from hunting abnormal creatures that harmed or even killed humans, or rescuing those hunted by humans in turn, Dr. Will Zimmerman also had regular sessions with his patients. It was a voluntary matter for them and he had been surprised who had made use of this offer.

Talking with Sally was difficult. It required a conduit, which was mostly his hand pressed against the glass, hearing her voice in his head. It was a distorted sound since his bone was relaying the sound waves, and it had taken some getting used to. She had opened up to him after the Bermuda Triangle disaster. Magnus had told her about the massacre of her people, and Will had watched her ethereally beautiful face contort. Her song of mourning had been heard for days. It had been strangely touching, drawing him to the underwater habitat, and suddenly she had pressed her hand against the glass in a clear offer. They had had several sessions since then.

Steve was another patient. Will hadn't given him the name, he had chosen it himself after watching one too many episodes of The Six Million Dollar Man. Steve was a frigging tall, armor-plated, lizard-like abnormal who doubled as a training partner for Ashley when she was testing Henry's weaponry. He was fast, looked ferocious, had a sharp sense of humor, and he had no idea if his people still existed. He didn't even know if he had had a mother when he had been born. He had grown up alone and when his home had been destroyed, Magnus had been there to help him. He had been grateful to her, but he also suffered from not knowing anything.

Steve was a good example for the whole concept of beauty and peace lurking behind a fierce exterior. With all the armor plates and dangerous looking spikes, he gave a good impression of a ruthless warrior of a lizard clan. As it was, he only ever behaved dangerously when working with Ashley. Actually he enjoyed reading and the internet a lot more.

Sophie Carter had come back to the Sanctuary a few times, but she mostly talked to Will on the phone. She needed someone to just listen to her, someone who knew about the abnormal, who understood the 'gift' and Will was there to her. They talked for hours when necessary, or she just needed a moment of normalcy.

Henry liked watching Will work, liked listening to the gentle sounds of his voice as he talked, even though he rarely understood what was said. Just the murmur in the background was soothing. Henry being the tech guy and Will either out on a hunt/rescue or with a patient, they found little time together, aside from at night in bed. So when Will was on the phone with Sophie and Henry was hacking away at his computer, the background murmur was like someone else's radio. Henry enjoyed it; more than he had ever thought possible.

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"Sucker," Ashley sang as she caught him looking over to where Will was talking with Steve.

"What?" He blinked, snapping out of his reverie.

"You really have it bad, hm?" She perched on the table and let her legs dangle.

"I don't know what you're talking about," he muttered and turned back to fiddling with one of the guns.

"You. Will. Cute butt, cute smile, must be terrific in bed," she teased.

Green eyes snapped up once more and he stared at his friend.

"Fantastic? Better than everything before him? Mucho hot?"

"Ashley…" Henry groaned.

"Oh, c'mon. Just having fun."

"At my expense," he muttered.

"At whose if not yours?" She shrugged and picked up a second series model of a gun Henry had been trying to improve. Expertly she snapped it open, inspected the ammunition chamber, then closed it and sighted down the barrel. "Cool. Can I test?"

"Not done. Come back tomorrow."

"I haven't had any of your new toys to test for a while," she pouted.

"And you won't if you keep interrupting me."

Ashley grinned and let her eyes wander over to where Steve was gesticulating and Will nodded.

"There's interruptions and there's Will, hm?"

"He's over there. Far away. Not hanging out on my work bench," Henry pointed out, giving her a little push. Ashley obediently slid off.

"But you wish he would. Hang out around here, maybe on the work bench?"

"You're creeping me out, Ash. More than usual. Why don't you take your overactive imagination and just…" Henry made a general gesture. "I don't know. Hunt?"

"My imagination is just fine. I'm a girl. I know how hot two guys can be. And you two? Major hot."

"Go!" he groaned. He grabbed another prototype and pushed it into her hands. "Go. Test this. Anywhere but here!"

Ashley's eyes lit up and Henry called himself a true sucker. "Sweet! Thanks, Henry!"

And she was off.

"I'm such a pushover," he grumbled. "All for a gun. Geez, the girl drives me crazy!"

At least he now had his peace and quiet again, with Will around working with a patient and Henry tackling a tech problem. Normalcy.

Normalcy was good.

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Normalcy was only good as long as your mate didn't get showered in some other Abnormal's pheromones, making said mate unstoppably attractive to whoever caught a whiff of the man. Whoever male, that is. Even Bigfoot had been acting weird, so Magnus had told Will to lock himself up and not come out until the pheromones had worn off.

She hadn't said anything against Henry joining their psychiatrist in his exile.

Normalcy had gone out of the window pretty fast.

So Henry spent the next twelve hours in a locked, secure room with a highly attractive man who, in addition to being his mate, also gave off pheromones from another Abnormal. The wolf was irritated and bent on reclaiming what was his; the human was simply horny.

After the first three hours he had to add a few new images to his mental hard drive. Will on his knees and giving him head was sexy as hell. Will spread out on the bed was even sexier. Some images were blurry, but the emotions were clear.

"Damn," Zimmerman breathed beside him, rolling onto his stomach and watching Henry from hooded eyes.

"I am," Henry replied, unable to resist touching the handsome man next to him.

He had no idea how they could still get it up, but he was. And Will was. And shit, it was good every time. They would be running out of lube before this whole pheromone mess was over!

Will smiled and he leaned over, kissing the other man. He gently bit the lower lip as they parted, watching Will's eyes darken.

Definite kink.

"You think it's hot," he murmured.

"What? You fucking me through the mattress? Very hot. And I won't be able to walk for a week."

Henry chuckled, letting his fingers play along the muscles of Will's back. He briefly circled the bite mark on the neck, drawing a little shiver. That alone had his lycan side rumble.

"You like doing it with a wolf, hm?"

"Are we going into the deeper psychology of abnormal sex?"

"Abnormal?"

Blue eyes narrowed and Henry grinned.

"And yes, I like having sex with you, Henry. I think this proves it. Pheromones aside, I'm not saying no to it."

"Good." He leaned over and nibbled at the scar, nuzzling over to where the second scar was. The one where the bug had been placed into Will's body. His mate hummed a little.

"And you're obsessed with that scar."

"Am not."

"Are too."

Will turned around, catching him in a hot, open-mouthed kiss. His thumbs brushed over Henry's pierced nipples and the lycan groaned. The little touches sent sparks through his system. Henry caught a whiff of pheromones again and the growl that rose in his voice couldn't be overheard. He recognized the expression in Will's face, too. His eyes were changing. It didn't deter his mate, though.

Things blurred again for Henry and when he was finally able to catch a thought, the mattress featured puncture holes that had clearly been made by claws. His brief rise of panic was soothed by Will, who drew him close and kissed him reassuringly.

"Will…"

Another kiss.

"I…"

"Part of the therapy," Zimmerman murmured, drawing him closer.

"Shredding the mattress?!"

"Hm-mh."

"I lost it, Will, I lost control!"

"You didn't. You were still you. With a few wolf attributes, but that's progress."

Henry felt the panic flutter through him some more. What if he turned wolf completely in bed? The very thought had him freak even more.

Will's hand drew gentle patterns on his skin. "You can't hurt me, Henry."

"I can," he whispered, terror settling inside him.

Yes, he could. Severely. Even kill.

"Henry, look at me."

He did, meeting the calm blue gaze.

"Passion is not aggression."

"I changed, Will. If my passion hurts you…"

"You're not two people. The wolf isn't another person. You're not schizophrenic. Trust me. Trust yourself."

But that was the problem. He trusted Will, but himself? No. The wolf was a wild creature and no amount of reassurance could convince Henry of the opposite.

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When they finally left the room, Will did walk a little oddly, but it was nothing, he told Henry, a hot bath wouldn't cure. Henry could only agree. He felt sore himself.

They passed Ashley, who gave them a cheeky little grin. Will frowned. She winked.

"Henry?"

"Hm?"

"Are there surveillance cameras in that room?"

"Hm? What room?"

"The one we spent locked up in the past twelve hours."

Henry appeared thoughtful. "Why do you ask?"

"Ashley. She… winked."

The lycan glanced at him, frowning more.

"And no, the pheromones only attracted males. So… cameras?"

The green eyes suddenly widened. "I think I should check that…"

Will sighed. "No, don't. Too late anyway if there was a live feed."

"At least we provided cheap entertainment," Henry replied and shrugged.

Will stared at him. "Cheap?!"

"She didn't have to pay for the porn site."

Will glared, but he stepped into their shared room when Henry held open the door.

"And it was much better acting," Henry added, laughing.

"Yeah." Will headed for the bathroom. "Downside is, we didn't get paid for it." And he closed the door.

Henry laughed more, shaking his head. He decided to give his partner the time to soak a little, then take a shower himself. Until then, it was time to check on the net and see if anything had come up. And if he came across some camera feed from the unused room, he'd store the film on his private server. Password secured. Eyes only.


	2. Chapter 2

"_What about the treatments you've been undergoing with Magnus which are so secret, I'm not even allowed to know about them?"  
"That's personal."_

Edward Meyers was a more regular patient than most of the others. He and his brother Robbie had been reunited and it had helped the savant to focus his powers. Robbie himself had a lot to work through, mainly watching his father commit suicide while he had tried to help.

Henry kept out of the way whenever Edward was around. He still saw the terrified young man from the elevator, someone who knew exactly what lurked beneath the deceptively human skin. That moment had burned itself into his mind, that horror and naked fear. He had met Edward only once after that and he had seen the same fear in the green eyes. He had seen the renewed terror.

The monster was still there.

He still took the diazepam, though not in the large doses from before. The real whammy, the one that had pushed back the wolf after the snake creature had been dealt with, had been dialed down again.

Still… he felt it. Underneath his skin, prowling at the edges of his consciousness, only ever allowed some free reign when he was with Will, in bed, having sex.

It was one reason why he wanted so desperately to work on control. He couldn't lose it again. Whatever Will said, he might hurt someone close to him, one of the others in the Sanctuary, those not of his pack. There were so many powerful beings here, those who would be immediately perceived as a threat to the pack's safety, the wolf would turn lose and either kill its enemy or be killed.

So he tried to learn control.

It wasn't exactly easy because Henry was terrified of unleashing the monster inside him. Giving up all restraints, letting the primal surface and physically change him, was such a horrifying thought, he couldn't let go. For now he only worked on suppressing it enough, watching Edward's reactions, but the boy still saw it. Like in the elevator he sought him out and confronted him in a completely non-threatening manner. He simply stood there, watched the fear, the movements of agitation and the need to flee rising in those wide eyes, and he had known.

Nothing worked. No chemical restraints, no meditation – and he had never been good at that – and no mantra's of 'I'm in control' in his head.

When Henry discovered several drawings of the wolf on Will's desk, he nearly lost it. His worst nightmare was staring at him, all bared teeth and vicious eyes. He saw a powerful creature, strong enough to kill whatever got in its way.

He hadn't been snooping around, This was their shared room, a place where both their work mingled together. Henry had his gadget corner, as he jokingly called it. Will had his text books and his personal computer with patient files and immediate access to all Sanctuary mainframe data. Stuff transferred from one work area to the other. Henry would find notes among his CDs, or his tools between Will's stuff. It happened. It wasn't problematic.

Now he was looking at the work of Edward Meyers and it was more than problematic. It was freaking him out.

"Henry?"

He dropped the drawing and turned abruptly. Will was looking at him, brows drawn down.

"Henry, what… oh…"

Yes, oh. Oh, the wolf. Oh, the thing that Will had never really seen. The thing that had been a blur as it had pushed the snake out of the window. While Edward didn't get the actual look, he got the feral, the primal, the… danger. He emphasized what made the wolf. He looked even underneath the skin of his abnormality and showed the world who Henry Foss really was.

"Henry, it's okay."

No, it wasn't. It wasn't!

"It's just a drawing."

"It's me!" he blurted.

"No."

"What do you think he drew?" Henry exploded. "Someone's little puppy dog? This is more of a hell hound! This is me, Will!"

"Edward doesn't draw reality in these sessions. He draws what his abnormal brain sees."

"And it sees the truth! You've never seen it until now!"

Henry stepped away from the man the wolf… he… had chosen as a mate. The man who had yet to truly, truly understand the thing he was sleeping with. See it. Touch it…

"I saw you," Will argued.

"You think you saw me?! You saw nothing! Nothing at all! You wouldn't have been able to tell what it was if I hadn't ended up half dead on the front lawn!" Henry snarled. He gestured sharply at the drawings. "This! This is me! This nasty thing lurks inside me!"

"I know."

"No, you don't! You never saw me! You never looked at this thing and faced it!"

Will stepped closer. "I would."

If Henry let him. If Henry let go and did what his body was so naturally able to do: metamorph.

He glanced at the drawings again and shivered, wrapping his arms around his chest. "No…"

"Henry, you want control," Zimmerman told him softly in that shrink voice Henry hated so much… and still reacted to so unconditionally. "Control isn't suppressing who you are. Control is facing it, handling it… it's freedom."

"I know that!" he spat. "I know it! Helen told me a thousand times! But I can't!"

Blue eyes filled with compassion and love met his frantic gaze. "You said I'm your anchor, that your lycan side reacted to me. Why don't you let it come out completely? You give it free reign when we're together."

Henry felt tremors set in, felt the panic turn into new terror. Having sex wasn't like letting the wolf come out to play. Having sex was letting instinct conquer logic for the moment they were together, but he was still there, still conscious. The wolf would never hurt its mate when they were together, but to actively call it out into the open completely… no. No, he couldn't!

"Will, please…"

"You never hurt me, Henry. I doubt you could. I know you already found a training room, a safe place, and I'm willing to work with you."

"I could never forgive myself if… if I harmed any of you…" he whispered brokenly. "You… I can't hurt you in any way…"

"You won't. I'm not scared of seeing the wolf." Will placed a hand over the drawing of the feral creature Edward saw, fingertips brushing over the black crayon.

"Will…"

"I won't force you. No one will. This has to come from you, Henry. You were ready to let Dr. Magnus operate on your brain, ignoring all the possible outcomes, but you won't let me help you in a less invasive way. Why?"

Henry slumped against a book case, shaking his head. Will was so close now, he could sense him even without looking.

_Don't touch me. Please. I'm going to lose it_, he thought desperately.

And Will didn't. He kept that last distance, but his heat, his smell, it was all there. Right now Henry was a patient and Will was handling him like one. Part of Henry hissed at that. He didn't just want to be another file. Another part agreed that there was a line right now Zimmerman shouldn't cross. It was bad enough that the doctor was sleeping with the patient. Sometimes it blurred the lines, but for Henry it was all part of the therapy. He needed both Wills. He needed the professional psychiatrist and he needed the mate.

"I don't want to see your expression when you look upon my abnormality," he finally whispered.

"I already have. Through the eyes of Edward, who sees the core of it. He sees pain and evil and power and strength. He doesn't always perceive the bad side," Will told him, voice so very gentle and understanding. "He also sees the soul. Your soul is that of a lycan, Henry. Magnus granted me access to your file. I looked up all there is about lycans. Edward's is not the only rendering of a wolf to be found. His is probably the most detailed and beautiful."

Henry's eyes snapped open, blazing. "Beautiful? What's beautiful about this mongrel?!" he demanded. "It's a creature! A monster! It's what kills!"

"If threatened. No creature kills only for its own pleasure. Survival is always the most prominent factor. You fight to stay alive. You kill if necessary. You also kill for food. You kill to defend your family. The wolf isn't a mindless, raving killer. It feels the same you do."

"I don't feel like I want to tear something limb from limb!"

"At the time of the change, the one I witnessed, I was in danger," Will told him reasonably. "You protected me. You protected the Sanctuary, your territory. You handled the threat, nothing more, nothing less. I believe you can control the wolf, Henry. Please think about it."

Think about letting lose. Think about shape-changing and becoming that thing inside him. Completely. Not just in a moment of passion, a change of the eyes, a more acute sense of smell, but physically let the wolf out.

He couldn't.

He just couldn't.

Will's expression told him that the other man was perfectly well able to read his wordless reply. He just nodded.

"In your own time," he simply said.

Which translated in Henry's brain as 'never'.

Will left, file and drawings in his hands, and Henry sank onto the bed. He stared at the floor, seeing nothing.

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Sitting in one of the many rooms, his books stacked left and right, Will Zimmerman looked at the incredibly detailed drawing of the werewolf that was Henry. Edward had done it and given it to him with a small, almost fearful smile.

"_Why did you draw it?" Will asked._

"It was on my mind. I saw him today. I saw you."

"Me?"

"I can see him with you." Edward fidgeted, evading his eyes, fingers twisting.

"Henry is my friend."

"He is a good friend. But he scares me."

"You drew a lot of monsters before. Did they ever scare you?"

"Yes. No. Some." The fingers twisted more.

"What else do you see here?"

"Lots of them."

"Monsters?" Will probed.

It got him a jerky nod.

"You don't have to be here, Edward, if you're scared."

"It's okay. Really okay. I like coming here."

Will regarded the young man, wondering what else he always saw here without telling, without drawing. He finally asked that question and Edward's eyes met his, a small smile blossoming.

"I can show you."

And he did. In vivid detail. There were more images of the wolf, some of Bigfoot, another of Sally, and even Steve. Edward had only once been down to the Shoe, but he presented Will with renderings of the Shoe's regular occupants, some of them so shy even Will couldn't really say what they looked like in detail, and it was breathtaking.

For some reason one of the wolf pictures appealed to Will. It wasn't a snarling, slobbering monster. It didn't loom or appear threatening. It was a lycan, it was Henry, but it simply sat there, looking at the watcher, almost like an oversized puppy dog. It was deceptive, but for some reason Will saw the same peace in that picture Edward had.

"It doesn't look like a monster," he remarked.

"It isn't." Edward regarded him seriously.

"You drew it as a scary creature before."

"I was afraid before."

"You aren't now?"

The boy didn't answer, simply fingered the crayon he was holding.

"Henry fears it."

"He's the monster?"

Will nodded.

"But if he is the monster, why is he afraid of himself?"

Will smiled a little. "Because of what others see. He fears he might hurt someone."

Edward's attention was on the picture again. "I can see him. I'm not scared any more."

"Because you're used to monsters?"

"Some are scary. All the time."

"But he might hurt you."

"Only if I scare him."

Will smiled more. "Yeah."

That summed it all up. If the wolf was startled, it reacted instead of taking a step back and analyzing the situation. It was where the human mind and the wolf mind still hadn't formed that necessary connection. It was what Henry needed to learn. To do that, he had to become the wolf.

Will ran his fingertips over the most dangerous looking of the pictures. He had never seen Henry, never for real, and even the pictures were only what Edward saw. They weren't the complete truth.

He sighed and placed all pictures into a folder and placed it onto the table that wasn't overflowing with books. Then Will turned to once more catching up on the Abnormals out there and in the world. He had so much still to learn and it felt like he wasn't gaining any ground.

And then there was Henry… Will forced himself not to think about his partner. It seemed like for every little step of progress they made, Henry was taking three giant steps back each time things got too close to his comfort zone. And that comfort zone was currently rather easy to reach.

Will sighed.

_Patience_, he told himself. _Time and patience and trust._


	3. Chapter 3

Henry didn't sleep in their room that night. He spent the entire time down in the Shoe, watching the monitors, watching the Abnormals that had sought refuge here. His mind was filled with confusion, with pain, and he wanted nothing more than to get this over with. But if he hurt Will…

There was a soft, inquiring grunt and he looked up, eyes burning from staring at the computer screens all the time. Bigfoot was looking at him with an expression Henry knew only too well.

"Don't say a word," he muttered.

It got him a cuff to the head.

"Ow! What?! Can't a man sulk in peace?"

"Not when it concerns more than just the man. Why do you still fight what's inside you?" Bigfoot asked.

"I'm not. In case you haven't heard, me and Will got mated."

Another grunt. "That's not what I'm talking about, Henry, and you know it."

He was silent, refusing to be baited.

"Your curse and your gift are one," his oldest friend continued. "They are neither good, nor bad, but what you make of them. You took the first step in acknowledging your need."

"Yeah. Okay, so I was an idiot and all. How could I have known Will was bisexual and thought I was a good catch, huh?" He painted a smile on his face. "Handsome guys never fall for geeks."

The brow ridges lowered and Bigfoot snorted. "You could have seen the obvious if you had opened your eyes."

Another piece of bait. Henry doggedly ignored it.

"Finding your mate gave you a little freedom, but you still cage yourself."

"Which is better for all involved! I don't want your blood on my hands!"

"You are more in control of yourself than you believe, Henry."

"Gift and all, I know."

The grunt was filled with annoyance. "Mocking yourself will only help you for now. Facing yourself will require courage."

"So I'm a coward?"

It got him no answer and the pale blue eyes regarded him knowingly.

"Oh great! Just great!" Henry pretended to sulk, but it wasn't working. His mind was racing now.

"Each of us here has powers. Each of us had to learn to accept what we are, face what we can do, and confront ourselves in how the others see us. We all fear to be outcasts. We all want acceptance."

Henry scrubbed a trembling hand over his unshaven features. He had done some stupid stuff to get Will to accept him, even though they had already been mated. Even though Will had told him he had found him, Henry, attractive right from the start. Will had been drawn to the human and he had accepted the lycan that came with it.

"I'm scared," he finally whispered.

A huge hand cupped his face, forced him to look into the humanoid face surrounded by long, shaggy hair. Bigfoot grunted softly.

"You are part of this family, this pack. No matter what."

The strong fingers squeezed him gently, driving the point home.

"And Will wants you, no matter what. Your gift reacted to his wanting you. You wouldn't have forced him into this if he hadn't been interested."

Henry nodded mutely.

"Then accept what he can give you."

"Control."

Another grunt.

Bigfoot removed his hand and straightened, looking down at the man he had known ever since Henry had come to the Sanctuary as a child.

"Control," he agreed.

And then he walked out of the computer lab, leaving Henry alone with his thoughts.

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"_I can't control myself!"  
"Not as of yet, no."_

The next days Henry had little time to think about releasing the wolf. Magnus had discovered something roaming around the sewer system and it was growing more and more confident, actually coming out into the open. So she started a hunt for the elusive creature that possessed chameleon abilities and the intelligence of a normal human. It evaded its captors and nearly took out two police officers when they cornered it.

It all climaxed in a vicious fight that left them all bruised and wounded. Magnus featured a black eye and a split lip, Ashley had scratches all over one leg, and Will had suffered a sonic blow that had knocked him out.

All in a day's work, sure, but Henry hadn't really enjoyed watching a limping Ashley drag in his mate. He was in control enough not to run over and ask stupid questions. Instead the human took charge, relieved Ashley of her burden and guided Will to one of the medical beds. Blue eyes, glazed over from pain and a probable concussion, fixed on him.

"Henry," Will managed, sounding relieved.

"Got yourself beaten up again," Henry sighed with mock drama. "Can't let you out to play with the grown-ups."

Henry knew enough from Magnus' call as they were coming home to know that this was the soft version of how things could have ended. There were enough dead already and the creature had been killed, too.

Will groaned and curled up on the medical bed, a picture of misery. Henry squeezed one slender shoulder in sympathy, then glanced over to where Helen was already checking her daughter's condition.

"I'm fine, Mom. Really. Just scratches."

He smiled a little and grabbed the first aid kit, handing it over to Magnus. Ashley would insist she was fine with a gaping hole in her chest and her head under one arm.

Henry checked on his mate, found some minor bruises, a cut to the forearm, and that Will had a major headache.

"Sonic blow," Ashley commented. "Took the full brunt."

"Forgot to duck?" Henry teased softly.

"Got to hell," Will muttered.

"Aw, I love you too."

Ashley was grinning, then winced as her mother dabbed iodine onto her scratches. Will grabbed Henry's wrist, curling rather strong fingers around it, and groaned in pain again. His eyes were squeezed shut and his breath came in short little pants.

"Headache," Henry mused, not even asking.

"Killer," was the hissed reply, then Will moaned.

There was nothing he could do to help, aside from being there, so he was. Just there. Waiting for Will's turn to be treated, waiting until his mate was released from the infirmary, if he was, and then sit with him in their room – or down here.

As it was, Magnus determined that Will needed watching and that he had to stay here for the night. Henry just grabbed his laptop and settled down for the night next to the injured man. Will was already asleep, but he had to be woken every hour, just in case. He could do that. No problem at all.

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"_Look, I can't account for myself when I'm that thing. And what if I hurt one of you? I can't let that happen."_

It took Will three days to fully recover, longer where the cuts were concerned. Henry tried not to worry too much. He didn't want to be some kind of obsessive animal, prowling around its weaker mate, wanting to protect, but he found himself tensing and snapping now and then, especially at Bigfoot. The Big Guy had just brought lunch and he had snarled at him because Will was in bed, asleep, and vulnerable. The ice blue eyes had regarded him calmly, then Bigfoot had placed the food onto the table and left them alone once more.

Henry had gone to apologize an hour later, feeling like an ass. Bigfoot had simply regarded him with the same calm he usually displayed.

"You need to learn," he had only said.

Henry had felt like he had been slapped onto the wrists and sent to bed without food.

He had to learn. He had to control the temper that was the wolf, the instinct that wanted to threaten whoever might be a danger to Will… and he had to work out how to handle pressure and stress. Will hurt and out of commission was such a stress factor.

He might hurt someone. Maybe not Magnus or Ashley or the Big Guy, but what about the other Sanctuary residents? What if they just looked at Will wrong? What if the wolf started to feel threatened by Sophie's empathic powers? Or by Edward's soul-deep look into Henry Foss?

"I don't want to hurt you," he whispered, looking at the sleeping form of his lover.

But he did. By refusing to work with Will. By censoring his own abilities. By allowing this fear to fester.

He had a measurement of control in form of Will Zimmerman. He could do this if he trusted him, if he believed that the wolf wouldn't harm its mate.

_Can I trust it? Myself?_

He did so in the throes of passion. The wolf had never harmed Will in those moment where control was equally not present.

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"…_whatever I do, I'm gonna wind up different."_

Another week after the encounter with the now dead creature, Henry finally came to a decision. He had looked over every unoccupied high security cell, had finally chosen one, and he had gone to Magnus.

"Are you sure?" she had asked what Henry couldn't really, truthfully answer with a 'yes'.

But he had said yes anyway.

"I am. Will's right. I need to work on this. With him. I just… I want someone on the outside, ready to tranq me should I lose it. Please?"

Helen looked at him with those ancient, compassionate eyes. "I will help you, Henry."

"Thanks." He dredged up a smile. "Been procrastinating long enough."

"Henry."

"I know, I know. Shelving it. Ignoring my nature. Denying who I am. I know, Doc, I know." He pushed his hands into his pockets, hunching his shoulders. "And no one's pushing me, least of all Will. He should, though. He's the psychologist. Well, psychiatrist. Whatever. He knows the medical bla-bla for all of this."

"He can tell private from professional, Henry. Will wouldn't push as long as you aren't harming yourself."

He laughed brokenly. "I'm already past that. I'm probably a good case file for a book."

"I allowed you to live this way, in denial," Magnus told him. "I'm to blame for your pain, too."

"I'm not in pain! I hate what I am, but I'm not in pain! Why couldn't I have been normal? Why did I have to be born an animal?" The hands were out of the pockets now, gesturing wildly.

"Henry…" She rose and approached him like one would a skittish colt. "You were born normal. You are lycan. It's not a disease or a tumor that can be cut out."

"I know what it's like to be human," he said softly, voice breaking. "And I'm so terrified to lose that, Helen. I don't want to be that monster. I want to be me!"

She caught his hands, folding her own around them. "By accepting your abnormal side, the human will only grow. There are so many Abnormals out there, some intelligent, some primal, but all those we got to know that can shift between two different physical stages have never lost their humanity. And those not appearing human in our limited perception are far more than that sometimes."

Henry glared at her. "I know that! I grew up with the knowledge of the abnormal! I've seen it all, the good, the bad an the ugly!"

And the beauty.

But Henry Foss wasn't beautiful, and the wolf was hideous.

"Don't you think I know all of that?" he went on, tearing his hands out of her grasp. "If I had always looked like some hairy rug, sure! But I'm this!" He gestured at himself, encompassing his human looks. "I'm human, Helen! I want to be human! I already made compromises on the wolf's part and now… it always needs more!"

"You need more," she corrected him softly.

"I…" he faltered, eyes filling. "I couldn't bear to lose Will because of this. I know he's my mate and he will stay with me, but I will lose part of him when he looks at the thing and sees… the animal."

"He loves you, Henry."

"Love isn't the all-powerful answer to everything!" he cried. "Maybe I could never physically hurt him, but he would know… he would see… in all detail… and it would kill me…"

And then she was there, gathering him into her arms, holding the younger man close and letting him cry. Henry clung to her like he hadn't ever since he had been a child, woken from nightmares he didn't understand, dreams of blood and screams and death.

Helen stroked over his head and he buried closer, needing the comfort from someone other than Will.

"I'll be there for you. Both of you," she whispered her promise.

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Helen had expected the breakdown sooner or later. Henry had taken a lot in the past weeks, starting with his sudden change, then to finding out just why he had done that, and finally accepting that Will Zimmerman was more than just a team mate and possible infatuation. She was happy for those two, even if part of her watched the whole development with a critical and apprehensive eye. She trusted in Will not to hurt Henry, and vice versa, but working relationships and intimacy should be kept separate.

So far, things had worked out well.

That Will would want to help Henry gain control of his abilities had only been expected, too. It was why she had hired him. He was good in what he did, people trusted him, and he worked well with the Abnormals at the Sanctuary. She was proud of how he had developed and how much he had given them as a team and as a friend.

Henry was quieting down, stepping back with a faint flush of embarrassment. She smiled softly. Henry wasn't a small child any more, nor was he a teenager who had just found out how terrible a power he harbored. He was a grown man, young for his own kind, and he was new in a relationship that meant the world to him.

"Sorry," he mumbled.

"There is nothing to apologize for, Henry," she told him calmly. "You know my offer. You know what is possible."

He nodded, evading her eyes.

"Henry?"

He briefly dared to glance at her.

"Trust Will."

"I do, doc. With my life."

"Then trust him with the wolf. I'll be there. Nothing will happen."

Another nod, then he stepped even further away gesturing vaguely. "I better…. Y'know. Work. System check. The whole shebang." He shrugged, clearly uncomfortable now with the raw emotions in the air. "I…I'll let you know… when…" Another gesture.

"Thank you, Henry."

And then he was gone, almost fleeing.

Helen sighed softly. Henry had a long road still ahead of him and consciously letting his lycan side come out without duress or danger was only a small, first step.

A soft grunt had her turn and look at one of her oldest friends.

"He's still torn," Bigfoot remarked.

"It's not easy for him," Helen agreed. "I made a mistake and I know that now. I let him deny his heritage. If I had taught him about his abilities, a lot might have been avoided."

Bigfoot gave a few soft grunts. "You wouldn't have been able to get through to him. Not after that first transformation. Fear is a very strong emotion."

She knew that, but she also knew that maybe, just maybe, there would have been a chance years earlier. Now it was up to Will and she wondered if he was truly up to the task.

Love was one thing. But reality liked to hit you between the eyes in a completely different way.

"They will be fine," Bigfoot said.

"I hope so. I really hope so."


	4. Chapter 4

"_Covering this up, Henry, is only gonna make it worse. I can help you."_

Will looked at the creature towering over him. There was no mistaking the wolf. No human features, just the wolf. Long snout, sharp teeth, pointed ears. Canine eyes regarded him as the lycan sniffed and snarled softly. It was bipedal. At least it was standing on its hind legs, but from the general build it was most likely running on all fours for speed.

"Henry," he said softly.

It got him a growl and the wolf's ears twitched. It seemed to sniff the air and the yellow eyes narrowed slightly.

"Henry?"

Another growl and the lycan prowled closer, circling Will, who stood perfectly still and let Henry scent him. As naked as the wolf was in its abnormal form, it was also covered in dense, dark brown fur.

"Henry, do you understand me?" he tried again.

The wolf rumbled, ears twitching again, looking indecisive. Will wasn't a dog guy, but he didn't think the wolf was showing signs of aggression. It was careful, keeping its distance, but it wasn't about to jump him.

Going down on all fours, still large enough that its head easily reached above Will's hips, the lycan circled him once more, then closed in and the dry nose touched Will's skin. He almost stopped breathing.

The wolf snuffled softly.

There was a sound coming from outside the secured room and the wolf snarled, rising to its full height and towering once more. So close to the creature, Will saw powerful muscles move underneath the deceptively soft fur.

"Henry, it's okay. You're safe here."

The snarling intensified and claws flexed.

The sound didn't come again and whatever it had been, Will didn't really care. Right now he was trying to find his partner in the depths of the creature, tried to calm him down enough to work with him.

"Henry, it's okay. Everything's fine. You're safe here. We're safe," Will continued softly, voice calm and level, very sure and easy.

The wolf prowled over to the door and sniffed, then started to explore the safe room. It appeared a little tense and when it pushed against the door, which wouldn't budge, it growled again.

"We're locked in. For safety. Just you and me. There's no one here to hurt you."

Another push. This time the wolf sounded more annoyed. Teeth bared, it studied Will, then snarled demandingly.

"We agreed on this, remember? A secure room? Henry, take control. Understand me. Don't let yourself be guided by instinct alone. You're not trapped. You're fine. If you want to get out, change back to human form."

The growl deepened and the lycan stalked toward him, blunt claws clicking on the concrete floor.  
"Henry," Will implied. "Take control."

The next sound was almost a bellow, a demand to be set free.

"I can't release you in this form."

Hackles rose and the long teeth were rather impressive. Will refused to back down, to let his fear show, but the wolf smelled it anyway. Its ears were now flat on its head and if Will hadn't known who this abnormal was, he might have hit the panic button. As it was, he faced down the irate creature, hands balled into fists, determined to see this through.

"You won't get out of here by hurting me," he whispered sharply. "And I know you won't hurt me. You're in there and you can control this. Take control, Henry."

The wolf pushed against him, the head colliding hard with one hip, but Will caught himself.

"Henry!"

The growl was menacing.

"Henry, listen to me!"

"Will, we need to stop this!"

The new voice had the lycan rise on its hind legs, roaring a challenge to the unseen one.

"No!" Will cried. "Helen, no!" He held up his hands, shaking his head. "Not yet!"

Powerful hands pushed him against the wall and he found himself eye-to-eye with something inhuman and feral, and he reacted in a way no sane person would have done – he buried his fingers in the thick neck fur.

"Henry," he whispered imploringly, feeling the blunt nails dig into his shoulders. "Henry, you can control this. You can. You already did. You won't harm me. Or any of us. Maybe a tight space wasn't such a good idea, but you're not a prisoner. You can get out any time you want – when you have control."

Hot breath touched his skin and he felt the nose nuzzle against his neck, scenting him.

"Henry…"

A growl followed his plea.

"You're not a mindless beast."

The whine was softer now, more docile. The fingers digging into his clothes loosened their grip and the wolf stepped back, just far enough for Will to be able to look at him more fully.

One clawed hand reached out and touched the human's neck, close to where the bite scar was.

"You know I would never hurt you," Will said softly, feeling something inside of him shiver at the touch. It wasn't fear. It was something else.

The ears turned forward and the menacing snarl was gone. He reached out and ran a caress over the short fur of the head.

"It's okay. Take control, change back."

The yellow eyes flickered, turned darker, greener, and the whole lycan form seemed to blur. There was a groan coming from Henry and his whole form twisted in a reversal of what Will had witnessed before. The snout retreated, the ears shrank, and the fur disappeared. Shedding not only fur but also muscle mass, the creature before Will turned back into the slender, human shape of Henry Foss.

Wide green eyes met calm blue ones, then Henry gave a whimper of horror. He stepped back, but Will caught him, curling strong fingers around a naked forearm.

"Henry," he said, smiling. "You took control."

"C-control," Henry echoed, sounding terrified of what had nearly happened.

His eyes roamed over the other man's body, trying to find injuries. Will just pulled him closer.

"Yes. You didn't hurt me."

"I… I…"

"Do you remember?"

"I never do," he managed.

"But the wolf remembers me."

Henry swallowed hard. He was completely naked, staring at Will like a frightened child. The psychiatrist pulled him even closer.

"You didn't hurt me. I told you. You can control this. We just need a bigger room next time."

"Uh?"

"You're a bit claustrophobic as a wolf." Will grinned.

"I… am?"

"Yep."

Henry frowned.

"Might also be the primal side wanting freedom. You have something against locked doors."

"Uh-huh."

"But this proved you have control. Easily startled, but in control. You can do this, Henry. We can do this," Will told him, smiling reassuringly.

"We can?" he echoed weakly.

"Yes. We can."

Henry was still shaking and he looked like just the wrong noise would make him bolt. Will framed his face and kissed him, slow and reassuring.

"Not very professional, Dr. Zimmerman," Henry whispered, voice wobbly, lips twisting into the mockery of his usual bright smile.

"I'm flexible. I adjust my treatment methods to my patients' conditions."

Henry breathed a little laugh again. "Good adjustment."

"Thought as much. How about we get you some clothes and leave this place?"

"Really good idea," Henry agreed whole-heartedly.

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Henry watched his mate sleep. Will lay on his back, one arm flung out over the other side of the bed, head tilted toward Henry's pillow. It showed the bite mark on his neck, the scar that had remained. It had been such a shallow bite, it should have healed completely, but the mark had remained. The wolf part of Henry approved; the human side was freaked out.

Sitting on his office chair, staring at the blond he now shared a life with, Henry felt memories tease him. Memories of the locked safe room, of Will close by. He remembered the scent of his mate, reassuring him that all was well with him. He remembered feeling locked in and the anger rise at the fact. And he remembered the startling voice of someone else, triggering a rise of aggression. He had been ready to kill… whatever threatened Will.

Wrapping his arms protectively around him, Henry shivered.

Protect.

It was foremost on his mind. Protect his mate, then his pack.

Part of him thought it had been the alpha's voice, but it had come so suddenly, into this enclosed, trapping environment, he had reacted out of pure instinct.

A whimper rose in his throat.

His teeth clenched, his lower jaw one big cramp as he tried to suppress the moan that wanted to rise.

He was a monster.

He was a feral creature.

Will's trust was warming, but he was still… dangerous.

Getting up, he slid from the room, padding barefooted through the massive guts of the Sanctuary. It was dark outside, barely three a.m. and aside from the night prowlers, no one was around. In the end he was in his lab, sitting with his computers, surrounded by cold, hard steel, wires and diodes and chips and nothing that lived and breathed and could be mauled to death by an angry werewolf.

It was where Helen found him, asleep over his desk, neck cramping, drool on the papers underneath. She touched him gently, running a cress over his spiky, unruly hair and along his neck.

"Henry," she said softly.

He started awake, blinking, eyes bleary.

"Henry," she repeated.

"Whu-what? Dr. Magnus? Oh hey…" Henry sat back, scrubbing a hand over his face.

"You should go to bed, Henry."

"I… wanted to work on some files… gadgets… things…" He gestured weakly. "Y'know."

Her smile was warm. "You did well today, Henry."

"No, I didn't."

"You changed because you wanted to."

"I nearly attacked Will!" he snapped, pushing out of his chair and past her.

"You didn't attack anyone."

Henry hit the wall with his fist. "I can't remember…"

Her hand was on his shoulder, squeezing gently. "In time, you will. You can train, Henry. You can take control. Of the curse and of the gift."

He swallowed hard. "Helen…"

She brushed her hand over his unshaven cheek. "You have come so far, Henry. You have accepted so much about yourself already. This is just another step. You said you wanted to see what you can contribute with your abilities. It's never easy to learn something, be it to walk, to talk or to control a metamorphic change. There will be pain, but there is also the reward. You gained Will because you accepted that already, haven't you?"

"Yes," he whispered.

Will. His Will. His mate. Will had already trusted him, believed in him.

"But this isn't about sex, Doc," Henry argued weakly.

She smiled, eyes sparkling. "No, it isn't. It's about searching your soul and finding that missing part. Not a mate, but that part of yourself that links the wolf with the man. Your kind is able to live in both forms. I took you from your people and you never learned to make that one important connection."

"We're not the most peaceful of people," Henry reminded her. "We're vicious."

"So are humans."

"Helen…"

She smiled more. "Henry?"

He sighed in defeat. "There's no easy way out, hm?"

She shook her head. "There never is."

"Was afraid of that." He slumped a little.

"Trust us. Trust Will. You came so far already, Henry. You can do this."

He sighed softly.

"I hope so. For all of us, I hope so."

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While everything inside Henry fought against more 'sessions', there was no saying no to reason. Especially when this reason came from Will. Zimmerman wouldn't force him into anything, he knew that, but the voice and the expression helped. Will made pretty convincing arguments, too.

So they continued. In a bigger room with re-enforced see-through windows, Will kept talking him through the transformations. Henry never remembered details, but he had flashes triggered by smell or sound or a touch. He tried hard to at least get a general idea what he had been doing while in wolf form, but it never happened.

"Give it time," Will told him over and over.

Lycans didn't black out in 'wolf mode'. Only Henry did because he had denied himself this freedom for so long. He was really more like two people, both connected, but one not acknowledging the other, and the wolf didn't know how to bridge the gap to its human side.

Will himself was dealing with seeing his lover change into a werewolf better than he had expected himself. Maybe it was because he had seen so much stuff already, so many strange forms and shapes, so many disgusting creations, that it turned the wolf into something normal.

Well, normal for the Sanctuary.

And he found Henry not the least bit monstrous. He was large and muscular and powerful, but Will had no real fear of him. He was impressed and he was cautious and he was respectful. Henry allowed to touch him, he allowed nearness, and while he was usually tense and alert and ready to attack what might threaten them, he had yet to even bruise Will.

It was a big step.

Leaving the safe room was out of the question. The wolf would be easily startled and one aggressive move could trigger a rather bad reaction.

What didn't work was memory recall. Will had tried it with several very visible, sometimes rather impressively smelly objects in the safe room. The wolf was interested, but Henry could barely remember that there had been something there.

"This is only the beginning," Will told him as they sat in one of the many huge rooms. A fire was crackling, Bigfoot had left them sandwiches and then retreated, and no one was disturbing their post-session talk. "You can't expect to go from zero to a million within a week."

Henry stared at the ceiling, his sandwich untouched. "Can't I? Those damned proteins didn't take long to make my life miserable again."

Will smiled briefly. "How do you know? The chemical process in the human body doesn't go into overdrive from one second to another."

He grimaced. "This body? No bets, Will. No bets."

"Your change was because of me, Henry. You said so yourself. And it took a while. From the stuffy nose of your supposed Nubbins allergy, to the fever, and then saving my sorry ass from the snake creature."

He turned his head and looked at the man sitting across from where he was lounging, keeping his professional distance.

"This isn't a new ability, Will. This is what I was born with. I should be able to adjust, now that the wolf is free."

"Bridging the gap you created between both your sides will take time."

Henry groaned and sat up. "I hate this! I hate these stupid abilities! How can I be of use like that if I can't even remember if there was a chair or smelly underwear in that room!"

"You will."

"Well, I'd skip the underwear if possible," he muttered.

Will smiled. He smiled back, still feeling more than just a little tense. He flexed his fingers, trying to remember what they looked like when he was the wolf and failing.

At least Will was safe from him. That was all that counted.

"Henry?"

He looked up and gave his mate another smile, this one wavering a little.

"It'll be okay," Will repeated what he had said so often before.

And a tiny part of Henry allowed him to hope.

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fin

Thank you for your patience. Real life interrupted the writing process with this one ;)


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